Suffering
by BookLoverExtrordinare500
Summary: After the events of Allegiant, Tobias falls into a deep depression. His friends try everything to snap him out of it and back into reality. Nothing helps. Not even a shrink. He ends up locking himself in his apartment daily, not eating or sleeping. Is this the end of Tobias? Or will he finally find his closure? Disclaimer: I do not own Divergent. Veronica Roth owns all characters.
1. Chapter 1

Suffering

 **Hey y'all! I just wanted to let you people know that this happens to be my first story, so please be nice. Constructive criticism is greatly appreciated. I would appreciate for there to be no flames. By the way, chapters will get longer. I just needed to get a feel for the writing.**

Chapter 1

Tobias' POV:

You know the one thing that sucks about life? Every time something happens, it comes back to kick you whenever you think about the past. It was something I used to laugh about. Every time a date got completely ruined, I would laugh at myself because of the things I never meant to say or the things I never even meant to do. Every time Zeke would get himself stuck in some odd situation or another, I would be laughing my head off. Most of the time it was his fault. The only thing is, that was then. This is now.

I haven't even smiled since she…died. I can't think her name or else I break down completely, sobs racking my body. It doesn't feel right to be happy if she's gone. Why should I live my life if she can't? Tris was everything to me. And after all that had happened, I couldn't believe it had ended like this.

A shot in the leg and one straight through her spine. That's what they told me. Even if she had survived, it would have been a sorry life. She would have been paralyzed. The worst part was that she was a rebel now in everyone's eyes. The only people who knew the truth were those she cared about. Those that I cared about.

She was my everything.

And now she's gone.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey guys! Sorry for the long wait with the update. I would create a very long and twisted story of how I was led on an adventure by some random hobo fairy who told me that I was the princess of some faraway land called Gooderuntoo Paladia, and that I would have to overthrow the queen to help everyone resume their normal, sad lives. But, as a speaker of the truth (mostly), I have to admit that I was just tired. And lazy. And I also didn't feel like turning on my computer. Ooh! And I had a lot of homework. But anyway, I won't dump all of my life's problems on to you. So let's get to the good stuff.**

 **So without further ado, here is chapter 2!**

 **By the way, I** _ **am**_ **aware that I just rhymed.**

Chapter 2

Christina's POV

 _I really don't want to do this_ , I think as I jog down the path to Four's house. As much as I don't want to go back there, I know I have to. I tried convincing Four that he didn't need to go, but he insisted. He said that he needed to face this himself. So I decided to tag along, for moral support.

Last week, Zeke, Amar and I had had the idea to talk Four into visiting the place where Tris was mur- I mean killed. It took some persuasion and a lot of bribery. Don't ask. It wasn't that hard, though. I think he wanted to face this as much as he had to.

I was absolutely positive that Four wouldn't even be able to step into that room. If he somehow did, He would probably get out in about ten seconds or so. It's been hardest on him. He somehow lost part of himself. The other day, he told me that one of his fears from the last time he took the fear landscape serum was of Tris dying and him being unable to do anything about it. It seems like a true nightmare to me.

Shaking my head to clear my thoughts, I walked up to Four's door and knocked. While I waited, I focused on putting a brave face for what was coming. I knew that one of us had to be strong for the other.

Four opened the door and said "hey." That was it, no more. He became more of a one-word man after Tris died. It was very obvious that he's suffered for these last few months.

"Hi." I answered, with a small smile. That was all we said. No more. Four closed his front door and we started walking down the street, towards the old factionless sector, where Zeke would be waiting with the car.

…

We reached the old factionless sector in less than ten minutes. Quietly, we got into the car and Zeke started it. There was no talking. Just silence. And fear. And also a _lot_ of tension.

To me, it seemed like no one knew what to do with Four now. It was obvious that Zeke hadn't entirely forgiven him for causing Uriah to get killed. Amar was just silent, so I had no idea what he was thinking. Personally, I didn't know how to treat him. Four was always my instructor, but never a friend. But even so, I wanted to help him. To be his friend. It was obvious that he'd been grieving a lot ever the months since she died, especially since the Allegiant had just burned her without a second thought and left her ashes in the morgue without even contacting us.

I shivered a bit at that memory. Four had gone completely out of control, shouting and screaming, and even throwing things around. Luckily, Evelyn had gotten to him before he could've hurt himself. From now on, she and I both had kept an eye on him.

Losing Will hadn't been this bad. Sure, I was mad and angry and grieving, but I didn't really love him. Not the way Four loved Tris.

Shaking any thoughts of Will out of my head, I strictly told myself, _Thinking about the past won't help you now. Get through this ordeal first before you cry. You need to be strong Christina, strong. That's why you were Dauntless. Not Amity; Not Candor. Dauntless. So start acting like it._

I felt the car jerk to a stop. I hadn't even realized that I had been lost in my thoughts the whole way here. I got out right behind Four, and stretched my legs.

I looked around at the other two; none of us were talking. There was just silence. No one wanted to address what we were about to face. Zeke had to deal with being at the last place his brother was alive. Four… had to deal with a murder.

We started to walk through the long corridors in the Allegiant's little scientific warehouse. We reached the dreaded door quite soon, not meeting anyone along the way. It seems like the Allegiant had already cleared out at his point. That was smart. Who knows what Four would have done to them.

The three of us shared a glance before staring back at that door. I was the first person who dared to take a step towards it. After a few long moments, I heard the other two silently step in behind me. Taking a deep breath, I opened the door to the room where David killed Tris.

…

The three of us stepped inside. Four walked past me to the control pad where Tris had typed in the access code to prevent the memory serum from going off. He was silent. Stoic. He just stood there for a few seconds, unseeing. I wonder what he was thinking. It couldn't have been good.

I'm not sure how long we stood there, staring at that control pad with blood-smeared buttons before Four abruptly turned around and almost ran out of the room. The door slammed shut.

None of us followed him. It wasn't a very smart choice to.

As I stood there, I felt a tear run down my face. It had only just hit me. I didn't have a best friend anymore.

When we finally got back to the car, there was a note on the windshield.

"I've taken the train."

The trains still ran throughout the city, but it was now a paid job (courtesy of Dauntless). We rode back to the factionless sector in silence. Zeke dropped Amar and me off.

"Are you going, or should I?" I ask. We both know we have to check on him.

"Let's both go. Just in case."

I nodded. We walked to Four's house and knocked on his door. No answer.

Taking out the spare key Evelyn had given me, I unlocked the door, and we stepped inside. I walked to the living room, calling out, "Four? Are you in here?"

Still no answer.

I suddenly heard something drop, and someone yelp. "Hey, Chris? I found him."

I made my way to Four's dining room, where it seemed Amar was. When I got there, Amar had his hand on Four's shoulder. The man in question was sitting in a chair with his face buried in his hands. It didn't seem like he was crying, though. He was just sitting there.

I put an arm around him and rubbed his shoulder. We just sat there for a while, thinking about anything, almost anything, other than the small blond girl that always lingered at the back of our minds.

 **Once again, I am sooooooooo sorry for not updating for what? A month? I blame school. Seriously, do teachers have to give that many tests a week? It's ridiculous.**

 **Anyways, on the subject of updating, I have no idea what kind of a schedule I'll have. It depends on homework, but PM me if I don't update for over a month. That should keep me on my toes.**

 **Sorry about this chapter. I know it was REALLY bad, but I just wanted to get something somewhat decent up. Please don't kill me.**

 **I will post Chapter 3 soon… or maybe later. Again, if you think I'm getting lazy, PM me. Then I'll try my best to get something up within a week or two.**

 **-BLE500**


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